Buckeye: Okay you worthless siblings..we have to get ready for Father’s Day!
Piper: (yawn) What may I ask is a Father? and why does the Father have a day?
Hearsay: Oh boy, Oh boy, Oh boy, another “Day”. Every time someone says it is another day we party down!
Buckeye: Okay Village Idiot Dog and Princess of the Rhelm, you know who Dad is, right?
Hearsay: Oh boy, oh boy, he’s a great ball thrower and gives awesome belly rubs!
Piper: That my dear court jester, is not the half of it. He is the best cuddler in the whole world, and he knows how to bring me my food and let me share his bed. Now that is a Dad! So what is a Father?
Buckeye: Well, now that I am thinking about it, I guess a Father is the head of a family but obviously who ever said that hasn’t met our Mom yet. I think it is called now Shared Head of Family. Well a Dad is also a Father.
Piper: So how do you get to be a Dad?
Buckeye: Well after that unexpected trip to the Vet, I can promise you from personal experience it ain’t going to be through my genes. But you know, I guess a Dad is someone who takes you in, loves you more than anything else, is willing to go the distance with you through thick and thin, and when you are with him you just feel like it is the happiest time in your lives.
Hearsay: Well! Thank God Mom found him because there weren’t any Dads around when I was growing up. I was a bit worried when he and you showed up. I had to ask what a Buckeye was. But the one thing I can say is that when Mom is gone and it is us guys and girls he makes me feel safe and warm. And even when he yells “Drop IT! Drop IT” I know he is kidding.
Hearsay: Hey, what do Dad’s do? How do they get money to buy me balls?
Buckeye: Gad! Dad works for the company that makes those big green tractors and he goes all around the world helping people grow food by figuring out why they should buy the big green tractors.
Piper: Oh, I thought he was a world champion golf player!
Buckeye: Well he is a BUCKEYE! Geez
Piper: And don’t forget he is a Doctor..
Hearsay: Oh no..he can cut on me and things..
Piper: No you village idiot he has a doctorate in psychology, why do you think he knows what we are going to do before we do it?
Hearsay: Okay so he markets green tractors, he plays golf, he loves THE Ohio State, he’s a doctor of the head. Anything else?
Piper: A dad is someone who loves you no matter what!
Hearsay: Oh boy! OH boy! let’s buy him a ball!
Buckeye: Nope! I think this year we simply bark and say “Happy Dad’s Day to the Best Day in the Whole World”
Buckeye, Hearsay, Piper: HAPPY DAD’S DAY ! TO OUR DAD, SHAWN NOBLE!